Home sweet home

MANY years ago, the Americans sent a delegation to France. Their mission was to search through Gallic cemeteries for the grave of a man that had been left unmarked – and to disinter the body and bring it back to America.

When the body arrived in New York city, it was reportedly welcomed by a special band and the casket was displayed to public for a day before it was re-interred with a monument erected over the man’s grave to recognise his status as a celebrated poet, author and statesman.

Who could have deserved such honour but John Howard Payne, the composer of the song – Home Sweet Home. The lyrics reflect the utmost importance of home, and also show Americans venerate home and family from which all human values spring.

The streets are getting busier than ever. People are flocking to department stores – and also airports. Yes, it’s home-coming for those who have been away from home, to celebrate the Lunar New Year (on Feb 10 this year) in familiar surroundings and among loved ones and friends.

Yearning for home and anything that reminds one of home is imbedded in human nature.

While in Kuala Lumpur last week, I met up with three good friends, Jocelyn, Peter and Wuan, for coffee. I brought along some local goodies – and kongpia (or guang bing, a type of bread baked in a tandoor-type oven) is always a favourite at such ‘long-time-no-see’ gatherings, especially among the Foochows.

Jocelyn, a Foochow but not-so-Foochow after living out of Sarawak for many years, was so excited about the kongpia that she took pictures and posted them on her Facebook, prompting an almost immediate response from her daughter at home: “Daddy asked if that’s kongpia.”

Jocelyn replied: “Tell daddy yes, but none for him.”

The daughter replied: “Ok..k..k..k..k. Daddy says you are not coming home.”

“Kongpia-deprived home,” Jocelyn quipped.

At that moment, I couldn’t help feeling (with a lot of wonderment) that the whole world actually dances with food from home!

Of course, Jocelyn is going home with or without a bagful of kongpia!

Home is a special place of love, laughter, simple joy and truth. Lest we forget, there are also responsibilities to be shared.

Now, how many of us, as parents, take our responsibilities seriously in keeping our children safe while celebrating the New Year?

Every year, amidst happy family reunions, there are always some mishaps to mar the celebration. What is regrettable is that such untoward incidents can be avoided with parental (or adult) supervision and responsibility.

Yes, I am talking about firecrackers! While letting off firecrackers is the Chinese way of greeting the New Year with a bang, it can most certainly dampen the celebrative mood if things go wrong.

Two weeks ago, the police were invited to give a talk to the pupils of Chung Hua Primary School No. 2 in Stutong, Kuching, on the dangers of playing firecrackers.

When sub-inspector Simon Low asked “who play firecrackers at home during Chinese New Year,” a sea of little hands shot up almost instantaneously! That’s what I love about children. They are so innocently honest.

But shouldn’t we be concerned about the situation or do we continue to close an eye to the potential danger it could bring?

Notably, almost all the pupils admitted to playing firecrackers during the New Year despite the ban on firecrackers in the country since 1978.

So, everytime we set off pyrotechnics, we are not only taking the law into our own hands but also passing it (illegally) into thousands of little hands no different from those of the Chung Hua Primary School No. 2 pupils in Stutong.

Had Low asked how many of the pupils knew firecrackers are banned in the country and playing firecrackers is punishable by law, he probably would have seen fewer little hands raised.

If the police were to issue summonses based on the confessions of these little ones, would you be receiving one for breaking the law?

I think it has to be said that responsibility for education
along this line rests with the home – not the schools. I would, in no way, recommend that schools take over such responsibility which comes, as it must, within the ambit of the home.

This is what home is for – a place where fuzzy values are set straight, law and order observed, false outlooks corrected and shoddy practices exposed.

While we may think the police have done a good job in educating the young ones on the danger of firecrackers, I have to state my case – that failure on the part of the enforcement authorities, their  apathy and laxity in throwing the book at the culprits, is a travesty of the law.

I thought poet Edgar A Guest put it wonderfully with these wise words:

If I don’t help my boy to grow up right, I call myself a failure no matter how much money I make or how big a reputation I get. I have a number of tasks to do, all of which I should like to do well; to be a failure in any one of them would be disappointing. Yet, I could bear that without whimpering if I were sure I had not failed my boy.

Not so much of me in the bank and more of me and of my best for the lad is what I would like to have to show at the end of my career. For me to succeed as a father, he must succeed. Unless my boy comes to manhood fit for the respect of his fellow man, I shall have been a failure. The glory of our handwork lies not in ourselves but in our children.

A blessed New Year to one and all.