Trust and hope in God take centrestage in the life of ‘cancer warrior’
Lydia flaunts her new hair after her last cycle of chemotherapy.
IN her affliction and moments of pain and near hopelessness, Lydia Bulan Kuchang found strength and courage to embrace positivity, and sought to rise to rediscover a living relationship with God.
She was diagnosed with Stage 4 metastatic (one that has spread) cancer in late April last year, two months before her final follow-up on her treatment for breast cancer Stage 3. Just as she was hopeful that the long treatment was going to be over at last and that she would be declared cancer-free, she was sooner told of the staggering news that the cancer had gone to her liver, bones, spine and lymph nodes.
For her, option was not a choice. She remained positive even in her very trying moments of hopelessness.
“When we have cancer, we cannot run away from it. We don’t even know if we’d survive, but we can choose to be strong and stand up to it,” she told thesundaypost.
Enterprising businesswoman
At 46, this amicable Kenyah woman is still the enterprising businesswoman she was before her first diagnosis in 2015, except that she has grown more courageous and confident since.
Lydia is managing a petrol station at Pujut 7 in Miri, a business that she established in 2007.
It was a very good start as there were not many petrol stations there then.
Later, as more petrol stations were set up with new roads being built, she had to sustain the business in the face of stiff competition.
“Eventually, with more developments in the area and the growing number of housing estates, business started picking up again,” she said.
“The first MCO (Movement Control Order) restrictions, as a result of the Covid-19 pandemic, had badly affected our sales. Somehow, we managed to survive through the bleak period, and thankfully, things are getting better now.”
A graduate with a Diploma in Business from Cadas Business School in Miri, Lydia hails from Long Aton, Ulu Tinjar near Baram where her father was a school principal. Her parents moved to Miri when she was 16. Married young, she finds great joy in her two little grandchildren from her only son.
The ups and downs of business have toughened her up even as she copes with metastatic breast cancer. She recalls her heartrending moments at the physician’s desk when she was first told she had cancer and what’s worse then, it had already reached its third stage. Her first question to the doctor was: “How much time do I have?”
Her immediate thoughts were on her husband, her son who was then at school age, and her parents.
The result put her in a quandary. What crossed her mind in those flabbergasting moments was how her family would take it.
How would she tell them that she had Stage 3 cancer?
But there was a glimmer of hope – the doctor told her that it was treatable. Nonetheless, she just needed to prepare herself for the side effects of the treatment.
Lydia in her office. The ups and downs of business have toughened her up even as she copes with metastatic breast cancer.
“My husband was calm when I broke the news to him. He did not show any emotion just as I did when my son cried inconsolably at the news. He thought I would die.
“I said to him: ‘We will overcome, I can fight it. You just give me moral support’.
“I had to be strong for my young son just as my husband was strong for me,” said Lydia.
Parents strong in their faith
“I must say that I am blessed to have parents who are strong in their faith. During the initial period, they would come every night to pray for me.
“My faith in God becomes all the more valuable and stronger. Had it not been so, I wouldn’t think that I could be this brave.
“After my first diagnosis, I had a mastectomy to remove my left breast. I was told by the doctor that I had 89 per cent of survival. I clung to the doctor’s words,” she said.
Six years later, in late April of 2021, when Lydia was told she had metastatic cancer, her heart crumbled for a moment no doubt her features were composed. She had been hopeful that she was on her way to recovery and looking forward to her final follow-up treatment, which was just a couple of months’ time.
But she was wrong.
Her positron emission tomography (PET) scan result was saying otherwise. It was hard for her to believe that her cancer had gotten worse after all the treatment that she had been through.
It was shocking as she did not feel any pain. There was no indication at all that the cancer had spread.
She has to be treated with hormone-targeted therapy for the whole of her life. The treatment is not only physically distressing with side effects such as joint and nerve pains and numbness, but also financially burdensome.
The drug for the therapy is very costly.
“The cost of the drug is not subsidised by the government. In its effort to ease the patients’ burden, the pharmacy offers patients three cycles of drugs for the price of two cycles, around RM20,000 in total. I have to undergo a cycle of treatment every three weeks for the rest of my life,” said Lydia.
Caring husband
“I’m thankful to have a very caring husband,” she smiled.
“Together, we strive to meet the cost of my treatment. But there are times when I feel bad to see so much of his money going to my medical bills, when he ought to be saving for his retirement and other needs.
“I feel I have burdened him with my health problems. At one time, I felt like quitting the treatment altogether, not that I didn’t want to live longer but that’s how tough it could be.”
It was through her pain and such moments of desperation that she began to develop a relationship with God – knowing God gives her the assurance that He is in control.
For Lydia, trusting in God is the most important thing that she has learned in her life.
“In fact, I feel blessed for having cancer. Cancer has brought me closer to God and increased my faith by which I’m able to overcome my fear and press on,” she said.
Reason to hope
Lydia Bulan Kuchang: ‘When we have cancer, we cannot run away from it. We don’t even know if we’d survive, but we can choose to be strong and stand up to it’.
Lydia has reason to hope. She also hopes that she could reach out to other cancer patients and share her story, bring comfort to them and inspire them to be courageous.
With her own battle against cancer, she could connect with cancer patients and tell them: “You’re not alone.”
In July 2021, while undergoing treatment, Lydia offered herself to help raise funds online in support of GoBald, the signature fundraiser for the Sarawak Children’s Cancer Society (SCCS).
GoBald is aimed at offering a public demonstration of moral support to cancer patients and their families, as well as raising funds to help children with cancer.
“I have met many beautiful children with cancer at hospitals, particularly in Kuching and in my hometown Miri, in the course of my treatment. I know the cost involved in seeking treatment, especially for those who have to travel to get treated.
“It moves me to do my part for those who are in the same boat as mine, at least as a fundraiser,” she said.
Having been bald twice as a result of chemotherapy, Lydia shaved her post-chemo hair for the project. Within a period of three months, she was able to raise a total amount of RM42,138 for the SCCS.
She has turned her illness into a motivation for her to keep moving forward and encouraging others as long as she is still able.
“In the course of my treatment, I meet a lot of cancer patients. I would tell them how I’m thankful that the sun is still shining and how we need to be strong even if the cancer hurts,” she pointed out.
The GoBald campaign is aimed at offering a public demonstration of moral support to cancer patients and their families, as well as raising funds to help children with cancer.
Keeping active at home
As good as her word, Lydia keeps herself active even as she stays at home during her treatment. She keeps her house very clean every day as she enjoys doing it. She takes medical leave, but she still goes to her office.
Cancer seems to have no hold on her as she tries to get the most out of life.
She regards her two grandchildren as one of her ‘greatest joy’.
“They bring joy to me. I said to myself, why quit treatment – don’t you want to see your grandchildren grow?
“I have hope. I have a supportive family – my husband, my son’s family and my parents who always stand by me.”
Lydia normally travels alone for her treatment, whether it is in Kuching or elsewhere.
“I don’t want to trouble my husband further. I learn to be independent in this fight against cancer and endure the pains without complaining much.
“In the long run, it makes me stronger and happier.”
Lydia comes across as a bright and jovial person. With her pleasant personality and good looks, cancer seems to pale into insignificance. While being open with her cancer, she often receives such admiring comments as: “You look so normal!”
Still, behind the smiles, courage and hope of the cancer-stricken woman is a praying soul.
Lydia prays daily.
“I pray to God: ‘If you will, let me live longer’.
“I told Him that I don’t mind the pain of the side effects of my treatment, as long as I can live longer so that I can have more time to be with my family,” she said.
To be able to live through the hard times with grace and resilience is a prayer answered.
For Lydia, each new day offers hope and assurance as she takes life within her stride and reaches out to many cancer patients with the message of hope and optimism.